From Dismay To Joy

Today was great. Katzy picked up and we headed to the Cave. After nailing a new move with nodders beta, the heel move on Pilgrim (couldn’t do the last move) I was pretty chuffed. Felt stronger on Trigger too which was good. Went to the box where I completely surprised myself. I had decided the other night to go for the full pill box link up, starting up jack Daniels and finishing up Last Orders. I thought this was a mile off. However first go I got through DD fell off with the undercut in my hand (don’t know why – surprise). After I did Last Orders while still boxed and it felt fine. So maybe it’s on. I’m physched out my tiny mind anyway. This was the best I’ve felt on the box for six years – a great feeling. Katz, Hock and Nodder were there so it was good to perform in front of these beasts too. Hock was a bit short for the box and Nodder was a bit stoned so I didn’t get a true appraisal of my problems. Katzy staying at mine tonight so I might bum him!

Dismay in the Den

Just got back from the Den and to cut a long story short i performed dismally. I feel in ok shape at the mo in general so why doesn't this transfer to the Den? What is it about this place that makes it so damn hardcore? Surely strength is strength. As Sharma says in rampage "a hold is a hold". This demoralising experience makes me not want to go back in there but then again if i could get back to the 7b standard i would be a monster on the rocks. Think i will try and go once a week and hope i see some improvement quickly! Maybe my failings are physchological. I feel like a dejected England fan:


Anyway i will hopefully get my car back tommorrow and the world will be my oyster once again. Don't how people can survive without a motor, i'm almost hanging from the rafters after two days! Sundays are shit aren't they. Thats all. Bye

Your Sunday Sermon - Issues of the Road!

Road Rage:




In a break from the traditional Sunday Sermon this week we shall look at issues of the road and driving rather than rock climbing. I want to start by saying road rage is not big or clever and that any rage that you feel from a driving scenario should remain within the motor car. DO NOT bludgeon an old dear to death with a crowbar. This, my children will result in an eternal afterlife in hell and damnation.
SPEED:
One of the things that gets my goose cooking out on the roads of Great Britain is the inhability of many people to drive AT THE SPEED LIMIT. Doing 40 or 50 in a 60 zone in good driving conditions is just plain inconsiderate. Think of the person stuck behind you trying to get on with his life – wasting valuable minutes of his life just because you can’t be arsed putting your foot down. And why do people sit in the middle lane or the fast lane on motorways, forcing everyone else to make dangerous undertaking manoeuvres. Why not just pull into the slow lane and let everyone past. Just cos you sit in the slow lane doesn’t mean you’ve got a micro does it! And if I happen to be driving round the marine drive trying to get home please pull over and let me past. No one wants a biggie up there sphincter.
ROAD MANOEUVRES:
Why stop at a roundabout if there’s nothing coming. There is just no need, just slip her into 2nd or 3rd and keep going, its better and more efficient for you car. And why spend an age turning, just turn you berks, its not hard, signal, and turn the steering wheel in a quicker fashion.
TRAFFIC COPS:
Are tits, end of…
ROAD WORKS
Ok so we have a situation in this country where there are far too many cars on the road. As my old pal spidey would say: “Too many rats not enough cheese”. Gridlock Britain is costing businesses about £20 billion a year as productivity is hit by staff arriving late to work. So what does the government and the councils do to ease this congestion. Well they dig up the roads just so everyone goes even slower causing even more congestion. Call me cynical but isn’t this just a ploy to keep unemployment down (a la Hitler in the 1930s). Surely our roads don’t need digging up every five minutes. Ok fair do’s some of the work is for road widening schemes that may in future reduce congestion but a lot of it is pointless. So my children go forth into your motor cars and remember the lessons you have learned today.

Typical chaos on a British road, arseholes and idiots!

Go Mule

Well i'm sitting at home tossing it off (not literally!) waiting for my brakes to get sorted on me car. Have been driving round in a flippin death trap! Got a message off 2nd Biggest Dick informing me that Worlds Biggest (Mule) has just done the 3rd ascent of his magnificent problem in the cave In Life 8a+. This involves a Font 8a to a shit rest and then a Font 7c to finish. However Mule uses a coin for his righthand making the second section at least font 7c+ and hence making the overall grade harder. The way mule does In Life is much harder and considering In Life is a hard 8a+ anyway, well.... you do the math. Whatever he's a fuckin arsehole for using a duff sequence. Pic of Me on In Life below:



Pic of the dirty bastard (he's on the left, thats another dirty bastard on the right) auditioning for Queer as Folk new series


Its good to see that dirty bastard ticking hard problems after so many years of injuries, two 8a+ in a week! Not bloody bad at all. Young buck Danny began his comeback by lapping Trigger Cut!. Back to the drawing board Doylo!

Sacked off, for now.......

Crackin day on t'orme today. Katzy was back doing more Big link linkage and he brought my old pal Kev Avery along with him. Jimmy Big Guns turned up too. Anyway after a few goes of In Life i made the decision to leave it till i'm a bit stronger and my palm has healed up. I hit the pinch a couple of times but the link is so fuckin hard for me. Anyway went back to Halfway House, start feels ok now but as i suspected i can't do Trigger again so thats that for the meantime. Finished off in the Cave with a familiar seige of the hard bit on Pilgrim, and low and behold after all these years i think i might have found a sequence that will work (with a bit of strength and persistence). So will try this next time. Katzy said i love the seiging process and he's right i do. I would hate to be Daniel Woods, climbing every problem in a few days (yeah right!). Went to the box and did WB and Jack Daniels (static)- prob the most satisfying moment of the day!

Halfway to Nowhere

Slopers in the cave felt too greasy today, it was cold but so still, i couldn't pull on them! So sacked off In Life and tried Halfway House for a bit, did all the moves (never done all the moves before) so that was good. I remember Nige saying with good beta the Halfway House section was only V8. Could be but i normally find V8's in the cave easier than this, anyway i almost got into Trigger Cut. My beta involved a very tenuous heelhook on something shit. Trigger Cut will be a formality as soon as i get into it (Ho Ho Ho)! Sacked it off anyway and went to Matts board, its a steep fucker. I did some (Den) 7as.


Cave Life boot:

May The Force Be With You