From Llandudno to Bellinzona

Well i'm off! Today i depart for Riccardo Simpsons gaff in Birmingham. Tonight we will celebrate Halloween with some of the city's finest totty. Tommorrow i catch the late ferry and then i will either climb a little bit in font or drive straight to Swizzy. I am in ok shape, if i am going to climb the things i really want to i will have to get a lot stronger, but thats why i've got a one way ticket. In Hueco i was significantly stronger at the end. I'm starting from a higher place this time so feel excited. It is a step into the unknown for me, i have high hopes but modest expectations. I am going to have to be strategic and pick the right problems if i am going to return with a healthy ticklist. The curse of 8a bloc has already been lifted from my shoulders so without that pressure hopefully i will perform. The purpose of my trip is threefold. First i want to crush many hard high quality blocs. Secondly i want to get lots of decent footage for my next film, i have started work on this already. And thirdly i want to gain the physchical attributes to crush Wales on my return. I have many projects that i'm just not strong enough to do at the mo, Halfway being an example. I hope all your climbing aspirations are realised here in the UK, crush my friends.
Finally i would like to wish Miss Nell Cattell good luck in her new job which she starts on Monday. These are the two main reasons i like to go round the Cattells:

From dismay To joy to dismay to joy

Gave Jim the tour of the mwyn on saturday. Conditions were bon, amazingly the driest i'd ever seen it. However the crest of a wave that i was riding on was about to come (predictably) crashing down. I've always struggled with this crag but this time i fully expected to crush. It wasn't to be, Be Ruthless felt as hard a link as ever and we couldn't for the life of us figure out Under the Bridge (fantastic this though). Jim ran round like a dog with six, the guy doesn't rest, jesus. He made quick work of Firestarter and Panty's Down:


Next day i headed to the pass, the weather was pretty dodge but i thought i'd give it a whirl. Wanted to try diesel, when ever i go to try diesel i end up trying Breathe and Vice versa. So i tried Breathe (well the crux last move). This is a scary throw of a fairly shoddy left hold with a high right heel. I'd never liked it but today i was stronger and could static to within inches of the hold. I changed the heal to a toe to make it less scary chalked up some shitty intermediates and nearly stuck the move. The bottom is fairly steady so fuck it i thought, physche on the last move will count for a lot. I got to the last move but my finger was pissing blood so i dropped it, bastard, a deep split, it was game over. This was given 8a by accident and Hock and Mickey seem to think it could be 7c+. Its still only had 3 ascents though, give it 8a i say, its hard. Anyway i took The cypriot, Clyde and Gav to the mill where we bumped into Stevie Haston (wad tick). I just got frustrated trying to climb with tape.
Cave next day, couldn't be arsed warming up and didn't know what to try, soon gave up on crucial, the worlds hardest 8a. I turned my attention back to Broken Heart, there had to be a way that doesn't dislocate your shoulders. I'd always wandered about the good edge hold on the lip of crucial, surely god had a plan for this hold after all it is particularly pleasant. And he did, from the broken heart start i spanned out to this, ace move! All i needed now was some trickery to allow me to come into the undercut, the most marginal heel toe on the planet worked on one occasion and i got to the easier moves before the jugs. Then i muled it, what a cock! Anyway despite being fairly dangerous to the groin area i was made up with this beta. Usually when i find easier new beta in the cave i kinda wreck a classic hardcore sequence. Well this time i think the moves are better my way, not as hardcore but better. Anyway its easier, no more than 7c+, but really nice. Pics:




My fingers are now cut to ribbons and i must rest. I may go back to the Cave on thurs to try and finish BH. Also i will catch up with Huffy who is in Wales for a few days.

Anyone recognise this man?

Whilst at Richie Hawtin last week i was groped in the bogs by some dirty man. Well i've found a picture of him on the net. If anyone could give me information that leads to the arrest of this sex beast please do so. Be careful though as you can tell from the picture he is mentally deranged, he still thinks he's living in the 1980s!

Never had a dream come true until the day that i met you.

Headed to the Gop with DC today, on our arrival we were pleased to find dry conditions, bones dryes to be precise. We were physced! After a quick warm up we pottered on some tricky moves. Danny demonstrated Push the Button 8a and i tried some of the moves. Then i thought i'd give my nemesis Smoke a Bloke a blast, this is a one move 7b+ which consists of a blind stab to a narrow pocket off a pinch. Quite powerful but luck is also needed. I felt strong on it but knew that more than strength was needed if i was going the latch the pocket. Anyway i got it picked my feet up and it was in the bag. Had been trying that one for years, the worlds hardest 7b+ anyone? Danny is trying the low start, very Jonnyesque, he says it could be his hardest yet, strong words indeed:

I had a quick look at my project, the crux was still impossible, back to the drawing board on this one. Then i went back to Push the Button. Told Danny this was high on the list to crush when i got back from swiss. I have always been able to do the end of this but the first move was always elusive. I played around with new foot beta and instantly it felt better, "think i can do this before i go to swiss" i remarked. Then i nearly stuck the move: "Think i can do this today" i remarked! Finally i stuck the move but only got 3 fingers on the crux pinch, i peservered anyway and got to the second to last move - it was on! Next go i hit the move again this time managing to get all my fingers on. I grunted came into the sidepull got my foot up and looked at the next pinch, it was do or die, i had to grab that hold. And i did and the next move was ok, i grabbed the jug and let out a roar that Simba would have been proud of. I topped out and looked back down at a shocked but chuffed DC. It had been a good sesh. I had seen the Mule do the first ascent of this problem and it had always been a hardcore thing in my mind. In the end it submitted after about 4 sessions- happy days! Cave tomorrow with the Stack and the rest of the swiss boys.

Route Vids

I've uploaded some route footage, check em:

Mill Pics

Some pics of a new problem i did in the Mill (courtesy of Simon Panton)





Also here is a vid by Chad including Ty flashing Schule and Hock doing Komilator. Also includes me being a complete punt.

Ticks, Richie and end of an era!

This was my last week in Lancaster (yes get in, no more abseiling in the rain, no more early starts and no more prison!!!). I went climbing in the week and managed to finish off Vitruvian Man, Nige's 7c at Trowbarrow. I really rate this problem, nice holds and nice moves. Well brown! Unfortunately though due to wetness i couldn't actually top the bugger out and only made it to the jugs on the lip, and it wasn't for want of trying. Anyway the local jury (Nige and Greg) have said i can have it so i'm not gonna lose sleep over an easy mantle. Friday night was Richie night at the Warehouse Project in Manc. I went to sheff then got the train over with some loons. And so the sheffield, welsh and scouse possee descended on the club and a good time was had by all. I got a bit pissed off with being manhandled by sausage every other second on the dancefloor so i buggered off to the back on my own where there were less hombres. The legend of the night in my eyes was Sir Matthew Donnelley who was royally off his tits:


Shit Bastard on the train back:


Had a few hours sleep back at the bears then headed to Rubicon on the way home. Dobbin and Char were there trying Zeke. Dobbin gave me a Kudos wall masterclass, very impressive!


I did the moves on Tsnami, i did the kneeling start to this years ago, the sitter is a good problem and a hard link I intend to return and finish it sometime. The low press felt just as impossible as ever however, not my scene. Then i popped into the tor briefly and did that undercut to sloper thing which for some reason i'd never done before. Very height dependent but felt easier than 7c to me, good though. So there you have it, i am a full time climber again. I've got some time in Wales then i head to swizzy! Yeah!