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Sunday, 25 May 2008

Your Sunday Sermon - Nightclub Issues

This weeks Sunday Sermon is about the past-time of night clubbing. A popular recreational activity that a large part of the younger population partake in. Father Doylo often samples the nightlife of various substantial settlements in order to canvass for the church and spread the lord's good word. In this weeks Sermon i'm going to outline some of the observations that have become immediately apparent on these nights out. Firstly why is every nightclub a total sausagefest. The sausage always outnumbers the ladies in every establishment. There is nothing that is more annoying than a nightclub of pissed up sausage. They are either out on the pull and so are eyeing up, groping and ogling the poor females or they are out to get bladdered with there mates. In this case they are on the dancefloor dancing like idiots, bumping into people and spilling peoples drinks. There is no need for this loutish behaviour. Fair enough go and have a good time but just calm things down a bit for gods sake. I HATE getting pushed around in clubs and having folk stand right in front of you when your trying to throw some shapes. So annoying. And why do girls get off with idiots who are only after one thing? Surely they can read them like a book! Have some self respect love and be a bit picky! Last night in a establishment called Caesars i was outside when a bloke and a girl walked past (on the way to
a taxi) i overheard the girl saying to the sausage "You do remember my name don't
you- whats my name?" This sort of behavour is disgraceful. Sex before marriage is a sin. And so go forth to these establishments but be wary my children.


lore said...

i remember your name!

Jasper said...

Perhaps you are frequenting the wrong establishments Father Doyle. I would expect a club called Caesers to be full of beered up, towny cunts to be fair. Seek solace in prayer or bosh a load of pills. Amen.